Lived Experience Forum

[Lauz]

Hi @BlueBay - so sorry for your loss. So glad there is some good support happening here. Another great resource to help with times of grief and intensity is Griefline 1300 845 745 - this could be a good place just to get some extra support. 

[Maggie]

@BlueBay  Thinking of you at this difficult time. 💜💜💜💜💜

[Owlunar]

Good morning @BlueBay 

You knew this was coming and this is the day

Alas - I know - there are no right words we can say that can ease your loss - every death is unique - and as hard as it is right now this day has its own precious light that can never come again

Your husband still has family - he has you and your children and your grand-daughter - still - I know from experience that the loss of his mother is very tough and you can be strong and support him

And your brother is most likely unaware of the distress he caused you in the past and he can't change that any more than you can - he will most likely have regrets about that too - don't worry about him

And now amid the many emotions you must be experiencing right now there is relief that the old soul has passed into peace from her possible awareness of her physical disability from age - this is her time for love and respect

And the funeral - the organisation and reality - difficult - I know - but it will be okay - you will be okay - think  about being okay

And you will be

My condolences to you and your family

Dec

Thinking of you

[BlueBay]

Thankyou everyone for all your love and support during this difficult time ❤️❤️❤️ 
we are seeing the funeral directors tomorrow 

we hope to do the funeral Monday or Tuesday next week. That will be a very tough day fir all. 
@Owlunar @Maggie @Lauz @Faith-and-Hope @Former-Member @Shaz51 and others following (sorry if I've forgotten names)

[Shaz51]

Ohhh lots of tender hugs for you family my sister @BlueBay  xoxo 

[Razzle]

@BlueBay   So sorry to hear your MIL has passed.  She hasn’t been in a good way for so long, all her suffering is over now.  The fact you feel you can’t cope is proof of how much you loved her.  She was a very lucky lady to have had you in her life.

As for your brother, I’m not sure what to say.  He offered his condolences, you can accept those and know you are the bigger person by not going any further.  You and he both know who he really is, right now you don’t need to spend one more second thinking of him.  Your thoughts are with your MIL and your husband, where they need to be.

Sending you lots of ❤️❤️ @BlueBay , dont neglect yourself in all of this, take

some time to look after yourself too.

[Former-Member]

Hi @BlueBay  ... I see you around this morning.  Just letting you know that I am thinking of you.

Sherry 💕😊

[BlueBay]

Hi everyone 

@Former-Member @Razzle @Shaz51 @Owlunar @Maggie @Gazza75 @Faith-and-Hope @MDT  and others reading 

I'm exhausted and have a headache. I am not sleeping and having moments of tears. Suppose that's grief. 
we saw the funeral directors this morning. Everything organised for Tuesday. The guy was so good. Didn't make us spend too much if not needed. We chose flowers all colours that she liked. Chose songs for mass and photos for slide show.  We had to chose a coffin.  That was very confronting. I lost it then. 😢

it's going to be a long day. 
I was crying last night. Flashbacks of the abuse case back. 
saw my doctor this morning just to touch base. He was worried and said I need to stay safe. I don't feel safe at the moment. 
I feel like a scared little girl. 
we gave them a nice dress for MIL. 
my mum is so stupid. She rang this morning to ask if I could organise flowers for her. I told her that ours are organised through the director. Told her to ask my sister. 
she annoyed me to even ask me when I'm so busy with funeral arrangements 

got enough on my plate to worry about her flowers 

also I told her thst the funeral is next week and she turns around and says "oh well I hope your dads ok he has a dr appt soon"

it's like she's pre warning me that she's not coming. 
I'm so over her. 
I don't know what day it is. My head hurts. I haven't taken my meds for days. I restarted this morning. 

[MDT]

Hey @BlueBay

My awesome friend.
Thinking of you.

[Gazza75]

Hi @BlueBay ,

Thanks so much for the update.  I hope you know that a lot of us are thinking and supporting you in what small way we can.  Maybe make a note to yourself about your meds as that might be why you are feeling off (along with everything else).  Perhaps a reminder on your phone? 

It's totally understandable that things are a blur and mess right now.  Don't be hard on yourself.

Really wish your mum would be more supportive and thoughtful with you.  

Lots of hugs and