Thanks for the love on Frgile thread @Former-Member Bouncing some right back at you.
Had a weird talk with a homophobic male hubby of a friend. Her awkwardness was palpable. Then met a gorgeous gang of 5-11 yo olds riding bikes etc on my walk. They invited me back to their street. We had a bit of fun. They wanted to guess how old I was. I love that age group.
No matter how wrong it is we dont have supportive family. Be you around others, and I am sure you will reap some rewards. We have to open for it, but not expect it.
@Former-Member
I wonder if you are harder on yourself than others are.
I have gotten used to not seeing people for long periods. It is the way my life has been. Sorry that the forum gets you down. At the beginning I had more variation in feelings about the forum, but have developed an attitude which is pretty solid. A mod emailed me to work at it to "suit my needs". Suiting my needs was weird and hard for me to figure out, but considering I am still actually here, and the likelihood of me going were very high when I first found the forum, something must have worked.
About check out chics. I think I had a harder time with them in my first 45 years or so. I live close to a small supermarket and some of the ladies there, I have seen for 18 years, they are part of the furniture and so probably am I. There is always a friendly nod or word. If it was a big one it would be much more impersonal. It is part of the reason I bought house as I was not sure I would be driving still and had to be able to shop on foot.
If bad memories with shop staff are there its hard to shift the vibe and the fear, so I am grateful.
Yesterday I had a lovely moment at a new fruit and veg near my doctor. My bag had one strap and the girl was worried, and we shared our stress re too much plastic in the world. She was young. I dont expect much and can be vague and distracted, but mostly now those point of sale moments are respectful. and So they should be. When I was young, I was so full, of my fear and poverty, then one day I remembered I had worked at cash registers a lot from 13 to 16 and I was cheerful, and that helped me switch from the fear, to more proactive. I had forgotten I had been in their shoes, as a worker. Since I have donned my "worker" hat I have found it much easier to deal with random stuff. You were a great worker too. We have our personal life and learning which fraction to share sometimes can build up rapport with people we see regularly.
Take Care and Gently Bently with you.
I have been in 2 minds about countless things in my life. It is almost a steady state for me, which I am finally feeling grateful for.
Hugs
Lovely to see you too.