Lived Experience Forum

[Teej]

Thank you @Faith-and-Hope. My farm is calmer, just as chaotic but not as noisy. Today I tried ringing beyond blue which backfired and then googled 'how to stop dependent thinking', not a winning choice either as I just felt more shame and defective. 

I feel very lost just now. Thank you for being here. I had no idea where to post. 

[Faith-and-Hope]

I was hoping you would return to this thread @Teej ..... I think it was a good idea in the first place, and still is, for posts just like today's ..... and the other thread that was created st the same time to celebrate the break-throughs ..... ❣️

[Teej]

Yeah but this thread was never intended as a crisis thread @Faith-and-Hope although I guess in the end it was relevant to how I was feeling too which was a huge fear of my dependency. I am not in crisis but maybe this was a pre crisis intervention 😊 cos I was winding 😬. 

Id love to know how you are going on an appropriate thread too. Like I've been looking for a few days now. 💜🤗💐

[Faith-and-Hope]

Well, my elephant in the room is what is going on with WH @Teej ...... and I am not feeling safe to write too much here at the moment while we are being investigated by a team of therapists. WH has indicated that he knows I am on the forums and has indicated that if I stop being here he will pretend it never happened.

I am still here.

We are trying to communicate on a daily basis and continue to treat each other with as much courtesy as we are able to, but it is still ending in argument often because there are gaps between our expectations and our communication styles, whether based in the underlying problems, or simply that things have changed and are not going back, may become beside the point ......

Have to keep working through the therapy process for the moment and see where that takes us, but good intention is definitely there. I am being bought gifts at the moment ..... it's emotional currency in his family ......

[Teej]

Thank you for sharing @Faith-and-Hope. I hope that post hasn't made you more vulnerable. It is a very difficult situation but seems like hopefully you are both in the arena too.......maybe not the same arena 😜.  Only joking. While there is communication and exploration there is hope. I may or not be right in thinking that at this point the emotional currency is offered as an olive leave which is more on the positive side than not. Here with you, thinking of you........probably more than you know. 

Sending love, hugs and flowers...... because they always make me smile 💜🤗

[Faith-and-Hope]

Making me smile too @Teej ..... thank you ♥️

[Teej]

Just realised does it make you less vulnerable if I don't tag? 

[Faith-and-Hope]

Just ignore it @Teej ..... if that’s okay.  This is what the anonymity of the forums is for.  

There have been other partners who have found their “significant others” on the forums before, and that has to be worked out by the parties involved .... and the relationship dynamics perculiar to them.

We are on the forums for a reason.

♥️

[Teej]

Can do @Faith-and-Hope. Just being here with you then.......and more than happy to be guided by you 😘💜🤗💐

[Faith-and-Hope]

Thank you @Teej ...... 💜🤗💐💕