Morning Check-In

[avant-garde]

@Dreamy 

I like this one, it feels like I'm slapping them in the face

you may ask me what I do

with my day to day

you may ask me what I've done

in the years before today

you may ask me what's my job

and I'll tell you different things

I'll tell you just my day to day

and deflect your question

dare I actually say the truth

no I wouldn't dare

you will try and problem solve

or assume that I don't care

truth is I have 2 degrees

and then 5 certificates

I am certainly qualified

just with no experience

you will say "just volunteer"

it's actually not that simple

they don't just take volunteers

they'd be publicly liable

"have you tried entry level"

I'm overqualified

they would have to pay me more

simply for my age

I can only work 2 days

or else I lose my house

I would also lose my payments

if I'm not careful enough

I have all of these restrictions

I can't be on my feet

it needs to be a desk job

that's not overly public

it can't be certain suburbs

if in case I am then found 

I may be a qualified librarian

but I've never worked as one

so I appreciate your efforts

I know you're trying to help

but can we change the subject? 

because right now I've had enough

[Dreamy]

@avant-garde oohh i love it and it really resonates with me. I'm unable to work for many reasons and it frustrates me cos I wish I could do something, people try to problem solve for me and it drives me nuts. 

Your way with words never ceases to amaze me, thankyou for sharing beautiful ❤️

[avant-garde]

@Dreamy 

I tend to write some poetry that I can send to others to shut them up about certain things; family, work, upbringing, romance etc

It's like "this is an answer I prepared earlier, you can shut up and rack off now"

[Dreamy]

Hehe @avant-garde this made me giggle. Why do some people gotta stick their nose where it don't belong.

You're amazing my sweet in so many ways ❤️.

[avant-garde]

@Dreamy 

My "nice" answer is

Oh I sell jewellery, tutor in tech, run workshops and have my art in exhibitions

But it's like if I'm not a stay at home mum and don't have a blue or white collar job then I'm a failure.

My GP said something last week, "it's the creatives like you that know the benefits of giving part of themselves back to society"

[Dreamy]

@avant-garde and from where I stand i think what you do is incredible. 

I hear you on the whole stay at home mum and the job front. 

I love what your gp said and it's so true. I love being able to do things to help others even if it's only in some very small way. 

[avant-garde]

@Dreamy 

The hardest assumption that I face on a regular basis is that I'm not a mother... comments that say I don't know what I'm talking about... 

The second hardest assumption is that my family aren't that horrible... that it can't be that bad... 

That's when I think "no, it's worse"

[Dreamy]

@avant-garde those comments are so hurtful. People don't stop to think before they speak. 

I hear you on the family part. They haven't lived through it, they haven't had to experience it so they can't understand or they choose not to. 

I know your story, or I know what you've shared here, it's horrible and it breaks my heart what you've had to go through. Noone should try to dismiss or try to minimise what it's been like for you. 

[avant-garde]

@Dreamy 

The assumptions of society...

Anyway, I'm off to bed, thank you for keeping me company

[Dreamy]

Anytime my sweet @avant-garde. 

Night night beautiful  ❤️