Supporting a loved one through an ED

[basilmintsage]

Hello everyone,

Today my sister told me that she was diagnosed with anorexia in February. It was a really big step for her to be able to tell someone, especially someone in our immediate family, and she's feeling really optimistic and motivated for her recovery. I'm a bit worried about this optimism because I know recovery isn't linear, but I'm determined to help her in whatever way I can through the good, the bad, and everything in between. 

I'm the only person in our family who knows and she is adamant about not telling our parents. We are both in our early-mid 20s and living independently. I know they'd want to help her, especially with the financial burden of treatment, but it's just not an option for her and I'm respecting that boundary. 

If anyone has experience supporting a loved one through an ED or other mental health disorder, especially if you've navigated being one of the only people in the know, I'd love to hear your stories. Any advice, words of wisdom, and unique perspectives would be greatly appreciated. I'd also appreciate hearing from anyone who has experienced or is experiencing an ED- what is the best way your loved ones can support you? I know everyone's experiences are different, but are there any universal things to avoid? 

Thanks

[Nala2022]

Hi @basilmintsage, welcome to the forums and thank you for sharing this. It sounds like your sister trusted you with something really important, and it makes sense that you’d be feeling both concerned and wanting to support her in the best way you can.

It also really stands out how respectfully you’re holding her boundaries around privacy, while still trying to find ways to be there for her, that can be a really tricky balance.

You’re right that recovery isn’t linear so it’s very understandable to feel a bit cautious about the optimism as well. Being a steady, non-judgemental presence and encouraging her to stay connected with professional support can often be one of the most helpful things.

I’m glad you reached out here, I hope others with lived experience or similar roles of support can share what has helped them too 💮